Humiliation

Why does it still get the best of me?
Why does it still sting so much?
I would never let you see how each word you sent
Shot through me and left me for dead
I’d never let you know how much I truly cared
Since you knew it all too well, anyway
Every other day I am over you
Every other day I am moving on
My stomach, no longer churning
My voice, not a child’s
My feet, firm where they stand

Confusion still clouds my mind
Dumbfounded and raw
Where was the change?
The turning of tables?
Why was I so blind?

Was it something I said that turned you against me?
I thought we were bigger than that
Why did you suddenly start to hate me?
Why did you do that to my head?

If I were to see you after these few months
I can honestly say, I don’t know what I would do
Would I be paralyzed simply by your presence?
Would I attack with full rage?

I’m humiliated at how this affects me at times.
I’m frustrated that you got the final word
How dare you come to such conclusions
It’s obvious you don’t know shit
How can you say what kind of person I am
When you wouldn’t let me show you my potential?

I hope things are well for you
I hope there are nights when insomnia drives you insane
I hope you have found happiness
I hope your words have caused you pain
I hope you have much luck
I hope you soon meet Karma