My Revelry

Let me out
I can't breathe
Listen close
I won't speak any softer
What's in it for me?
This pursuit has me shaking down to the core

My revelry
To your retreat
Avoiding what's obvious
My ambivalence
Your persistence of physical happiness
My longing for peace
Your content with unstable qualities

What will it take to be free?
How would you respond if someone called you out on
Your selfishness?
Your narrow mindedness
I won't let it be me
Let it be someone that you truly adore

Let me ask one more time
How would you feel if left behind?
I'm on my way out
These walls are caving in

One plane trip or car ride and I start again

You cannot come along
You cannot assume that you are welcome
I'll do it on my own
Fear-ridden and determined
Full armor on

I won't deny that you've helped
You've made it so much easiser to turn my back
I might write you some day
I might come back to visit but don't hold your-
Just hold your breath and wait

How much louder
Do I have to scream?
Do I make you nervous?
Will I cause a scene?

Mr. Curiosity

Hey there Mr. Curiosity
I heard you killed a cat
But the cat was me
I don't mean to get too close
I always try to be a friendly ghost
I couldn't help myself
You should have seen the way you looked
Those eyes and that smile
I tell you, you were something else
I thought I was fine, but I knew I fell
For months I've been on this road
Walking alone with no where to go
There were many passerby's
Filthy hitchhikers just looking for a ride
I didn't give many my time
But I thought I'd give it a try
Now under this cold night sky
I'm all twisted in knots and I think I know why
I promise to take things slow
But this guy's excited and trying not to show
You know how to make me smile
Truth is, I really dig your style
I wanna pull you near
I wanna kiss your lips
I wanna just be here
Forgive me for being so bold
But it's been some time
The night's long and cold
With the help of my beer
This poem isn't filtered and it's not too clear
But I wrote it all anyway
Big surprise, I have a lot to say
A lot for you to read
Mr. Curiosity

Diamond Ring

How many lashes do you give yourself?
How many trophies are on your shelf?
If I've got it all and you've got none
Then how are you having so much fun?
You say I think too highly of myself
But it's you
You worship you, yourself
You flaunt your sorrows like a diamond ring
Pick up the phone and start listening
Fill up your glass ten more times
Think of some more depressing rhymes
Take a sad picture
Post online
Start a discussion about your poor poor life
Maybe that helps you sleep at night
Don't let me stop you, it's your own right
You flaunt your sorrows like a diamond ring
Shut the hell up and try listening.

Awaiting Metamorphosis

I can’t help but feel these four walls closing in
Once my sanctuary
Now only my prison
I can’t help but feel this air growing thick
Chocking on the tension that has hold a death grip
I was born restless
Always looking for ways out
With age, I’ve grown impatient
Being fed only by doubts
If I could hit the road now
I think sanity would be saved
But since I’m far from release
I’m preparing to finally cave
My best regards
To you and yours
I’ll be back someday
Carrying a newly lit torch
You can forget me if you need
When I at last return
I won’t be the same man you see
I've tried to be strong
I've played far too long
Don't be offended if I no longer give a fuck when you think I am wrong
I've been looking for your encouragement
But it has been all too clear
Your selfishness is more important
I have to soldier on
I have to keep chin up
When the day is to come
Don't dare ever ask why I left
Let's see how loud I can be silent
If your eardrums aren't already busted
Let's see how bright I can vanish
Before you proclaim I'm acting out
Good riddance and goodnight
This is long overdue
Years from now I might wonder what has become of you
And smile

A Journey

Blind Heart says,
"Take hold of me, lead me to the things I see.
Adventures past have frozen me still
The arrows ahead just shoot to kill.
Take me, lead me home."
A damaged soul knows all too well
The gold paved roads that lead to hell
And redemption is only
To dream too far
Put your lips to mine
Touch my face and open my eyes
Under the stormy sky
Let it fall on me
Troubled waters in the sea
Black Crow sings his melody
Is it possible not
To be filled with doubts?
In the night
Let yourself dream
Dream of things that could have been
And things that may
If you don't stay
Darkness soon invades your mind
Awaken
Screaming
You will find
The truth is more terrifying
Take my hand and take my heart
Together we stand
Through the dark
Never letting go
Waiting for dawn
The sun is rising in the sky
Now it seems our time to fly
Over the trees
And their fiery leaves
Please don't run
Don't walk too slow
Promise me you'll never go
Let this blind heart see
Let it plant it's seed
A damaged soul can always mend
If it finds peace in the end
But the journey is never
Soft and Sweet

Little Boy

I know a young man
Who tries to be wiser than his years
I know a little boy
Who takes comfort in his fears
But he doesn't know how transparent he is
And he doesn't know what letting go is

So he runs
And hides
And laughs
And cries
But you can only run for so long in your life
Let it out, go
Be free
Let it down
Talk to me

Sitting in a bar
Three drinks and filling up
Close enough to danger
Just close enough to touch
But he doesn't see the potentials in his way
And he spends all day waiting till he can fade to gray

So he can run
And hide
And laugh
And cry
But you can only run for so long in your life
Let it out, go
Be free
Let it down
Talk to me

Oh the poison that you take
The needles on your skin
The love that you crave
And the pity you swim in
Won't wash it away
Won't drown it away

But he runs
And hides
And laughs
And cries
And screams
And begs
And hurts
And wonders why
Let it out, go
Be free
Tear it down
Find release

I know a young man
Who tries to be wiser than his years
I know a little boy
Who takes comfort in his fears

Needed

You don't get to disengage
Without me questioning
And I don't get to place the blame
Without you giving reason
The worst in me is now brought out by your
Contradicting behavior
It seems too often, for your ego
I become the enabler
If you can't stand to be alone
I deserve to know my purpose
How can you tell me all of these things you feel
Then move right on to another?
I'm not your doctor of psychology
And I'm sure as hell not your mother
You can change your appearance
You can change your game
But you can't change the darkness inside you
We both crave attention
But in different ways
We both want to feel needed
But your immaturity
Your childish ways
Make me want to withold and deny it
You don't see how you've done wrong
Must I be the one to prove it?
Don't dare argue
Don't dare disagree
I've gained too much to lose it
Take the bottle
Take his hand
Take all you feel you deserve
I'll take the kiss
All the empty words
I'll write it down and deliver
The spot light is fading
I can ignore you
If need be
I'll forget you